Villain
A rogue prosecco cork, which scuppered Eritrean cyclist Biniam Girmay’s bid to win the Giro d’Italia. Girmay celebrated winning stage 10 of the race with the obligatory opening of a bottle of fizz, but the cork flew out and hit him in the left eye, temporarily blinding it. After the next stage of the race, the podium bottles were sensibly uncorked in advance.
Hero
George W Bush, for finally, if inadvertently, owning up to the truth. In a speech on Wednesday, he accidentally criticised Vladimir Putin’s “wholly unjustified and brutal invasion of Iraq”, before quickly adding: “I mean, of Ukraine.” It was “the mother of all Freudian slips”, says journalist Ash Sarkar on Twitter.
Villains
Adidas and Gucci, which have, as part of their hotly anticipated new joint collection, released a $1,290 umbrella that isn’t waterproof. The pricey parasol is “meant for sun protection or decorative use”, according to its online listing.
Hero
The state of Oregon, which, says Rod Liddle in The Spectator, is finally getting round to installing tampon machines in the male loos of its schools. “It has always seemed to me grossly unfair that girls should be provided with this facility but the poor boys utterly ignored.” Thanks to the state’s “chirpily named” Menstrual Dignity Act, equality has at last been achieved.