“Is anyone actually in charge in Downing Street?” asks The Sun, as Britain’s “petrol panic” escalates into long queues and “forecourt fist-fights”. Troops have started training to drive tankers as backup, although the “bungling” Environment Secretary, George Eustice, tried to deny it yesterday. Ministers were warned about the lack of HGV drivers months ago, says the Mail, but they just “buried their heads in the sand”. American singer R Kelly has been found guilty of racketeering and sex trafficking. The 54-year-old faces “anywhere from 10 years to life in prison”, says Ernest Owens in the Daily Beast. After two decades of being tolerated as a “questionable dirty uncle”, Kelly has finally been brought to justice.
Last week I took my toddler clubbing at Fabric in east London, says Emma Barnett in the I newspaper. We turned up for a family rave at 2pm, “stone-cold sober”, and boogied all afternoon. Of course, keeping an eye on a three-year-old “doesn’t leave one totally carefree”. But the feeling of “letting go and dancing with the DJ” was exhilarating. It’s time we older adults hit the dancefloor again.
A few years ago I had the same weight-loss treatment that Linda Evangelista has blamed for leaving her “permanently deformed”, says Sarah Vine in The Mail on Sunday. The 1990s supermodel says she was not warned about a potential rare side effect that grew fat cells instead of shrinking them. To those who believe Evangelista brought it on herself, I say: “Let she who has never looked in the mirror and contemplated such a treatment cast the first stone.”
On the money
A hamster called Mr Goxx has been trading cryptocurrencies since June, outperforming Warren Buffett and the S&P 500. Its two German owners have rigged up the “most high-tech hamster cage in existence”, says NPR. Their furry pet runs on the hamster wheel, making random selections from dozens of cryptocurrencies. It then chooses between two tunnels to decide whether the owners should buy or sell. Mr Goxx’s portfolio is up nearly 20% since June.
It’s Derby the nine-year-old goldendoodle, one of the winners of the annual dog surfing championship at Huntington Beach, California. Hounds of varying shapes and sizes competed on Saturday, and were ranked according to confidence, length of ride and overall ability, with the proceeds going to local rescue centres and charities. Derby, who is listed on Instagram as a “public figure”, has 27,600 followers and a range of tie-dye beachwear.
Coat check girl“Goodness, what beautiful diamonds!”